Reply to Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage?

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Reply to "Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] This is the part that terrifies me- I think a person that can cheat and lie has something flawed within them- which only, maybe can be credited with lots of introspection and therapy. He needs to learn to empathize more. I don't think someone could cheat if they has the ability to be empathetic. [/quote]

Since -- what, 25-50% of spouses cheat at least once during their lifespan? -- that a vast majority of people must be "broken" or flawed. Have you never lied? or cheated in any way (not necessarily on  your spouse. On a gf/bf? on a test? on your resume?)

We all make bad decisions. We all make unhealthy decisions (third slice of pie, anyone? did you skip the gym AGAIN this morning?). Cheating is among the biggest and baddest of the bad decisions. But it isn't uncommon, which makes me think it is normal. Cheaters aren't flawed. They are normal. We are all -- at our very core -- selfish. That doesn't mean I approve of cheating, but I understand it.

I do agree with with your comment that cheaters probably don't have the ability to empathize. At least with their spouse at that current time. [/quote]

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