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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not the OP, but I too would really love to hear people's advice about how, specifically, they got their families to agree to this.  How did you broach the idea?

I am pretty certain my family would think we are selfish, lazy and cheap if I made this suggestion.  The thinking would be, if everyone else in the family can make the effort (AND they all make less money than us) what is our problem?  It doesn't help that my mom really loves shopping for gifts -- we end up with so much stuff we don't need or even like all that much.  It would make her sad if we told her we didn't want to exchange gifts anymore, or even just limit it to the children.

Compounding the problem, my husband's family goes even more overboard than mine.  We literally receive hundreds and hundreds of dollars worth of gifts  from his side of the family, and it is embarrassing that we don't spend as much on them, even though we buy a lot of individual presents for everyone -- and this happens EVERY year.  I'm getting to the point where I really hate the holidays because we have over a dozen people to shop for, and each of them has to get multiple presents.  Gift cards are a no go, it would be considered lazy and thoughtless.  It is ridiculous.  I hate it so much.

I just would really love to hear specific advice for how to deal with this issue with families where EVERYONE else seems to love buying tons of gifts for everyone, making the person who disagrees the spoilsport.  [/quote]

This sounds horrid. I will pray for you. [/quote]

[b]I wish I had some advice. I am in a similar situation. I am beginning to hate Christmas because it has become nothing but a gift buying occasion. The true meaning has been lost in my family.  Family equates it with tons of presents. We all have more than we need. We end up buying gifts just for the sake of having a mound of presents beneath the tree. I find it so depressing.[/quote][/b]

This is exactly  how I feel when with DH's family for xmas. Everyone is so stressed over gifts. To the point where Dh and I have been at whatever is open on xmas...walmart, walgreens etc to buy gift cards for people who unexpectedly were in town/he forgot about/etc that got us a xmas present. It's all so tit for tat and frankly 99% of the things that aren't gift cards end up being donated or thrown out.  I also don't care for spending $500 to fly there for the holidays and then spending about the same on presents for his huge family..I desperately wish they would either do secret santa, 1 gift per person or just gifts for the KIDS. Frustrating to buy so many presents for 50 yr old adults....[/quote]

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