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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like he was being inappropriate, but why does she not say anything when it is happening. My DH sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night turned on and may start rubbing up against me and touching me, but if I'm not into it I just snap at him that I'm tired and we go back to sleep. The times that I have been into it I sometimes just don't say anything and enjoy it. I think my Dh would be a little upset too if in the morning I told him he raped me after not objecting at all when it was happening.    [/quote]

This. I like it when we wake each other like this. But if she didn't, I don't understand why the OP wouldn't say something. Not that it isn't non consentual rape, but you can't compare to stranger rape because there is preexisting intimacy and communication style between spouses. They need to work on both of theirs, it sounds like.

Also, if she's laying there pretending to be asleep, her change in breathing and slightly tense body would tip her partner off that she's 'playing along' wouldn't it? I think she needs to make it clear that it's not ok. They need to establish an action code word for when it's on, and if no code word is forthcoming, he needs to spank it alone and not mess with her. Maybe there are some cultural/religious issues at play here because I can't imagine my DH continuing along penetrating without me being involved/aware, and I also can't imagine not telling him to stop if I wanted him to.

I'm sorry for anyone who had/has this as an ongoing issue. It sounds like necrophilia.[/quote]

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