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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Indian-american here. OP, you married a South Asian man, presumably raised in Pakistan, not here. How, exactly, do you convince a Desi man NOT to bring his parents here ? The only way you could is if there are other siblings still in Pak that they could stay with. O/W, especially if your spouse is the only child, they will bring their parents - we are not a culture that believes our parents should get old alone. And honestly, you shouldn't expect them to either. You wouldn't want that for your own parents, would you?

The best you can hope for is to build an inlaw suite for them (with kitchen/bath/tv area) - make this a condition if you can with spouse. We have a walk-out ground floor basement and my inlaws stay there when they visit. It provides some separation. And then get them desi TV via satellite, and put them on a schedule, as a pp suggested. In our town, there is a temple nearby with activities for seniors, so take them to something like that. My FIL was sick, so we actually had to hire a caregiver, and the caregiver took my inlaws to the temple twice a week and for some senior games thingy and then to the park for walks.

And then, and this is the hard part, but you'll have to make clear boundaries with MIL. You can do it kindly, but you still need to do it. FWIW, I lived with both sets of grandparents most of my life as a child and I saw my mom do this - she didn't fight, but she was very firm on what was her role and what she could give up. [/quote]

OP here: Its good to see a man's response about this matter. I wish my husband was like you. I know he will never agree to this. If I bring this topic, I will be considered spoiled and not cultured. He will never agree for them to stay in basement or another place..
I pray to God that this South Asian obsession with parents just somehow stop magically.[/quote]

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