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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Example:  student is absent Every Single Time there is a test.  He is always "sick" that day, with a note or phone call from parents.  Are the parents lying?  I don't know, but the other kids in class sure notice that Mr. Absent on Test Days always gets an extra day or extra weekend to prepare, and they are annoyed as they feel this is unfair.  Often I wonder if Mr. Absent on Test Days is a student with serious test anxiety, but it's often hard to talk to parents about that possibility, generally because they insist he was sick, perhaps because he was, or perhaps because the parents are truly trying to get him that extra day to study.  Poor kid, being pressured so much to perform on tests that he has to see his parents lie for him... and maybe learns that it's OK to lie in exchange for some perceived gain.[/quote]

Yes, I see this pattern with some students. --OP[/quote]

I am beginning to get it.  When trying to think of things parents would live about this really didn't occur to me - maybe because my own parents would never have done it and if I had asked I would have never heard the end of it and they would have been all over me for weeks asking what my homework was and double checking it, quizzing me for tests, reviewing reports, etc.  I'd of much rather face what ever the teachers consequences were then risk sending my father into micro-managing hyper-drive.

I'd find parents lying about this sort of thing very frustrating too.  And the more I think about it, it upsets me.  If the child as some sort of anxiety and needs help that's one thing but chronic procrastination should not be enabled.  That is just so wrong.  This is yet another reason I could not be a teacher - if I was a HS teacher I would want to lay down very strict rules as needed, I remember in HS teachers who said if you were absent that day a major paper was due your parents could drop it off or you could mail it and it had to be postmarked that day, and other policies that would never fly today, such as telling us that if any of our papers contained a run on sentence or a fragment that the best we could get on that paper was a "C".

My kid is in K so I really wasn't thinking about it but when I start to think about MS & HS I "get" the problem - the mind reels.  I have a friend who was always getting over-involved in managing/problem-solving for her son. I remember her getting go to his college frequently one year to deal with some crazy roommate issue and thinking she was off her rocker.  I could completely see her keeping him home if she thought he needed more time to work on something.  Fortunately that kid is a some sort of math genius and rebelled by trying hard to keep his mom out his daily life and has a wonderful very dry sense of humor.  My favorite story of from his HS days was when he would absolutely refuse to take a week off school to go to Disney World - it drove her nuts but not much she could do and every time they went during the school year he would stay here with his grandparents of a friend.

To get back on point - OP, you have my complete sympathies.[/quote]

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