Reply to When a friend or family member is making a huge parenting mistake...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am in a similar situation, OP.  Except I was a total jerk and had a strong emotional reaction first.  Now I want to tell this parent/family member the facts calmly but an hesitant to open the can of worms that I did when I was an asshole and screamed at her.

Not to hijack your thread, but does anyone have advice for me?  Can I now approach the subject calmly just to get on the record?  [/quote]

Keep your mouth shut.[/quote]

+1[/quote]

Wow - I disagree 100%!!!  If I thought my sister was doing something that would emotionally hurt my nephew I would explode at her - and then apologize but definitely restate my objections calmly later.   I love my nephew and my sister!!!  These are not some random strangers whose business I can butt out of - they are constants in my son's, DH's and my life.

I would definitely bring it up again, PP.   [/quote]

I'll be looking for your sister's post on the "Family Relationships" board.  Probably something about her sister yelling at her for deciding to formula feed her son.  And then, after they'd moved past it (so she thought!) her sister sent her a follow up email with links and "calm" explanation.  How thoughtful![/quote]

PP here and no.  My nephew is a very, very bright but sensitive and well behaved boy and only 23 months old.  He has been home with a loving nanny who reads to him about two hours a day which he loves - and older books for four and five year olds.  This is a smart kid.  He is also small for his age.  My brother and SIL decided to send him to a big, franchised daycare for 8 hours a day at least and fire his nanny "to toughen him up".  I am opposed to everything about this plan but mostly his motivation.  I am a school psychologist and consultant for the top DC private preschools and I know this is a mistake.

I was a jerk to lose it on my SIL when she told me.  Now I do want to talk to my SIL and brother about this calmly.  And we are close - my brother's family and mine - having kids the same age and shuttling between each others houses for holidays and often evening date-night care.

I feel I have to say something.    [/quote]

Please don't. You know this is pretty typical, don't you? Many, many kids go to daycare/preschool all day from an even earlier age. Except for a couple years when I worked part time, my two kids were in daycare/preschool all day from the time they were infants. They are now very well-adjusted, happy, social elementary age kids.[/quote]

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