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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - we live in Bethesda.  I am pretty sure I am not the only one who has insecurities and I think part of parenting is recognizing my own insecurities versus what honestly would be better for the kids.  More space when they are teenagers, so we have one of the houses all of the kids congregate in?  Work more hours? Money set aside for traveling?  More college savings?  It sounds like some of the previous posters are 100 percent confident in their choices, but I find the trade-offs more complicated.  I would think there are parents who have made difficult choices in order to purchase a larger house, and they are happy they did so.[/quote]

We're in Chevy Chase and also have a small house (1900 sqft, no basement.) My kids occasionally comment on this; I particularly recall my oldest, on one of his first playdates in K, commenting with sheer wonder when I went to pick him up, mom, they even have a downstairs! But that kid is now in middle school, and as far as I can tell he genuinely doesn't care that our entire home would fit in the (beautifully finished) basement of his best friend. His brother's favorite house to visit is the tiny, Spartan apartment of a family friend whose parents were living paycheck-to-paycheck for a while. Maybe it's a boy thing; as long as there is a nerf gun, some legos, or a video game and some chocolate chip cookies, they're pretty content.

Still, I think it's perfectly human to feel envy or insecurity. And it's not like we can sit back and say, oh yes, we have more/better experiences - kids who live in $2m+ homes in CC or Bethesda have some pretty enviable travel schedules! I feel it much more than my kids do, and when I do find myself thinking like that, I just try to remember - and remind them - that we are among the infinitely small percentage of humankind who has everything we need and a whole lot more, even if it might pale in comparison to the McMansion next door. I also tell them that our highest priority is schools and opportunities for them - our mortgage is way lower than we could technically afford on our salaries, but college funds and retirement savings are much more important to us than a fancier kitchen. Everyone is different, but for us moving further out would make our crazy juggle of 2 FT jobs and 2 kids harder than it needs to be - it's not worth it for a rec room!

Finally, just remember that there are a lot of wildly expensive houses in this area that aren't much bigger than yours or mine. I channel my own house envy into trying to make mine as nice as possible. [/quote]

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