Reply to Underemployed boyfriend-wwyd?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Underemployed boyfriend-wwyd?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You’re not a gold-digger for wanting a guy who is more ambitious.[/quote]

No, I'm not a ge digger. That's such an awful thing to say. I love this guy and want to marry him. It just bugs me because he seems like he is afraid to really put himself out there and know what he wants and get it. He isn't stupid; he has a masters degree from a great program. He is just too intimidated to get out there and figure out a career path that's lucrative. [/quote]

Too intimidated? Is that his take on it, or yours? Some people (myself included) don't really WANT to be the mover and the shaker and make the sacrifices required to be that person. I have a good job in private industry, but I wouldn't want to rise any higher than I am now. I work 40 hours a week. I don't have to work weekends, generally. I don't have to travel. I never miss my kids' activities. I have time for hobbies, and friends. The executive level staff at my company are on the road constantly, often overseas, sometimes weeks at a time. One guy told me the other day he spent more days on the road in 2014 that he was home. He loves it. You couldn't pay me enough to be this guy.

Is he happy with his place in life? [/quote]

This.  The OP says he is "afraid to know what he wants and get it."  Maybe what he wants isn't a "lucrative" career.  Maybe he just wants a job that pays the bills and lets him have time for himself.  I could have taken a much more lucrative job out of law school, fighting to make partner and big bucks.  But I don't want the hours.  I'd rather have the personal time for friends, family, and hobbies.  I'd rather get home in time for dinner every night.  I'd rather tuck my kids into bed every night and hang out with my husband.  The problem here is that OP defines "ambition" in a very narrow way--making as much money as possible--when, in fact, people have different goals.  It's possible she and her SO are just not on the same page about what is important in life.  In which case, they should break up so she can try to find a guy who works really hard and makes a ton of money and he can find someone who doesn't value material things as much.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics