Reply to I'm lost. DD told me she was raped.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm feeling shell-shocked and questioning everything, including my reaction.

My DD is almost 16. It happened almost a year ago with a boy she knows but hasn't seen since it happened. She was a virgin.

I'm not even sure what I'm looking for in this post. I know my plan is to have her visit her doc for a check-up and screening and to seek out support groups and a therapist.

I've posted before (in the teens forum) about her issues with academics and how it stemmed from her low self-esteem. This all came to a head when she failed school this year. Little did I know this is what lay beneath the surface. She wrote me a letter. We had a good talk and I cried. She admitted that she dealt with depression and suicidal thoughts (she says she made an attempt).

I'm just questioning everything. Did I react correctly? Should I have been blazing angry? I feel like I took the news too calmly. I'm just second guessing everything.

Again, not sure what I'm asking here. Just feeling lost and incredibly sad. [/quote]

Your daughter knew you would be mad about her failing so she made up this rape story, the attempted suicide, all of it.  IF this were a true sexual assault, she would have told you the day it happened, the name of the boy. It happened at a friend's house ? Does the friend know ? Do the parents know an assault took place in their home ? If they don't, they need to know. Their home is a crime scene. Has this boy raped any other girls ? Is he in the habit of going to young girl homes and raping the ones he likes ? Why aren't you down at the PD station filing a report ?  This needs to be reported. Was your daughter on birth control ? STDs ? Maybe this boy is on the prowl right now. You need to report him !

Kids are smart today. They know how to manipulate adults and where sympathy lies.

This is not the 60s anymore. Sexual assaults need to be reported. If she refuses, you will have your answer.

I'm thinking she failed because school was boring and she just wanted to have fun so she just pissed away a year.  Now she's ashamed of failing so she told you this story for you to feel sorry for her.

My niece told this same story when she got caught skipping school and failing. Next came the baby. There was no rape.

[/quote]

Yikes PP! I don't think OP doesn't believe her daughter though and numerous PPs have explained very well why they never told about their assaults immediately. Just because she didn't in this case doesn't mean she's your in need of serious help relative. The child needs help no matter what.

[/quote]

Can we PLEASE all just ignore this awful troll and go back to supporting OP?

OP, sending good vibes to you. Take it one day at a time -- it will take a while for her to heal.[/quote]

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