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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I think its easy for many of the other posters who are Christian or Christian/atheist not to understand.  I am in a mixed marriage.  We don't really practice any religion but I identify as Jewish as I do our child.  My husband is fine with it and knew from the beginning I would never be ok with a Christian child.  I have gotten a tiny (and I mean tiny) tree for those relatives visiting to keep the peace but it goes up the day before and promptly goes down.  Its blue and silver and at best a foot tall.  My child does get Christmas gifts from his Christian family and we save them for Christmas, take pictures, etc. and write our thank you notes.  They send me Hanukkah gifts instead.  You can find a balance but I'd try to keep the tree in her room if possible or not in a main living space as a compromise.  Talk to her as it may be more of an issue with your husband making her comfortable vs. her actually caring.  I think its highly inappropriate to have a Hanukkah bush, or what every someone else calls it and I'd never do it except for being in a mixed marriage to make relatives happy.  [/quote]

The stepdaughter lives in the home. It is her home as much as anyone else's in the family.

If my stepdaughter who is Jewish moved into my Catholic home, I would make sure a menorah had a prominent place in our home during Chanukah. I would put a mezuzah on our front doorpost. I would do whatever it takes to let her know that she is an integral part of the family. 
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