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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here again. Thank you for all of these interesting perspectives.

In thinking about why I want to know more -- I guess to fill in gaps in the family story line. If this is all true, it does explain a few gaps in the big picture. It would also, in some weird way, make my grandfather more real to me. All I've ever heard is how wonderful, smart, kind, generous etc he was. It does display the good side/ bad side of human nature. Also, my father died last year and I'm becoming increasingly aware of how these stories -- bad and good -- will not always be available to us.

However, I also think there is no reason to upset my mother by bringing this up again at this stage in her life. I don't know if she ever made peace with it, but my rehashing it now will not help that.

I think I can assume that it is true and as posters have suggested, I could always research more on my own if I ever really want to know. And there is nothing to prevent me from making my own form of restitution in a quiet way, perhaps by making a donation of money and/or volunteer time that would help the larger issue. No, it will not change what happened all those years ago but could close the circle among these generations of my family.[/quote] I think this is a wise move. There are some painful things from my own childhood involving long dead individuals which have no impact whatsoever on my children and which would be painful for me to relive. It is my story to share or not to share and I would resent like hell anyone believing that they had an absolute right to dig into the past for curiosity's sake. Op's mother and other relatives should have that same right to put the past behind them.[/quote]

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