Reply to Feminism, femininity, and marriage

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Feminism, femininity, and marriage"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If they want a woman to stay home with the kids and cook, there are plenty of women who enjoy that out there, who have made the choice to do that instead of a career (but the choice is thanks to feminism). [/quote]

One of the allegations in the post is that there is social pressure by feminists against women who are content with running a family. [/quote]

This is my takeaway as well. I'm a feminist, but I think the feminist movement in it's current incarnation rewards women for developing traditionally masculine traits (ambition and competitiveness come to mind) while distancing itself from the "softer, gentler" feminine image. It encourages women to do well and to strive mightily in the public sphere, but seems to dismiss (or just ignore) the call of the domestic.[/quote]

See, as a feminist and the mother of a girl child, it just breaks my heart that we are still considering ambition and competitiveness to be "masculine" traits while "soft" and "gentle" are feminine traits. This is not good for girls OR boys. I actually think that the pressure that ambitious, competitive (read: professional) women face is that they are expected to demonstrate ambition and competition at work, are expected to be nurturing and mothering and loving and intimate at home and are also expected to take care of the house. The pendulum has not swung from "women stay home, do all work" to "women avoid home, do not marry." It's swung from "women stay home, do all work" to "women do all work, while also being out of the house for 8-10 hours per day." It's exhausting![/quote]

Is it wrong to identify certain traits as masculine or feminine? The genders are distinct.[/quote]

The genders are distinct largely because of cultural markers like assigning gender to traits that are clearly expressed by people of all genders. My husband cries at sad movies. Does that make him "feminine"? I am the one who brought the power tools into the marriage and put together all the furniture. Does that make me "masculine"?

These things have the meaning that we assign to them. The problem comes not by the assignation of meaning but by the value judgments applied to it. You'll note that women's ambition is often described as "ball busting" while men who are not athletically talents are described as "throwing like a girl." Those are negative valuations on the traits, based on the perception that one gender is better suited to those traits than the other. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics