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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I feel like ours is pretty much over but we haven't taken actual steps to end things.  Sad but resolute. Looking for stories from people who've btdt. Wha happened? How did you know it was the end?[/quote]

Why did you get married?  Serious question.

All the marriages that I've known about that turned out to be starter marriages  -  at least one of the participants knew in ways either big or small that it wasn't the right thing to do, but did it anyway.  "He'll change."  "Once we're married we won't fight."  "We've been together for 5 years and we want kids."  "Everyone is wrong about her."  "Whatever, we can get a divorce if it doesn't work out."  It's not a question of when you know it's the end - it's when you can admit to yourself that you knew all along that you shouldn't have done it in the first place.[/quote]

Wrong. People can change. People lie. Someone who you thought was perfect for you can make a terrible decision and change the way you see them.[/quote]

Wrong.  If you think that is true, you don't know the person at all.[/quote]

Are you always so smug?

I lost my crystal ball. Had no way to foresee that DH would abuse cocaine 4 years into the marriage.[/quote]

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