Reply to Complicated Issue: Best Way to Blend this Unique Family????

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Reply to "Complicated Issue: Best Way to Blend this Unique Family????"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you are so selfish, and I am so sorry for this man's children.  You know that these children are not ready to have another woman move into the home they shared with their now-dead mother, and your first concern about this is...protecting yourself from them in the future if their dad dies, too?

If you love this man, you will tell him that, for the sake of maintaining a good relationship with his children, he needs to delay marriage/your moving in for a year or two and seek family counseling with the children to make sure they are adjusting OK and give them time to grieve.  If this doesn't happen, he may lose one or all of them forever, and really mess them up in a lot of other ways.

But of course you only care about yourself, so better prepare for how you're going to keep those brats from taking advantage of you.

My own dad married a woman just like you a year after my mom died.  It changed out relationship forever, and his wife made it clear that she regarded my brothers and I as annoying.

You are only in this man's children's lives because their mom is DEAD.  Do you get that?  You need to move slowly if you care about them, not move in right away.  Why not just date the man AND get to know his children, earning their trust and allowing them time to grieve their dead mom before you plow in.

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