Reply to Really, how do I make friends?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]New poster here.  I moved to this area knowing no one and having no local family and have had a lot of difficulty making friends.  I moved here as a married woman, working full-time, now a few years later I'm a SAHM.  It has been much easier to meet people as a SAHM compared to being a married women working full-time, but still, I only have a few friends, and I long to have a social circle or wider support network.  It's really hard to make friends, I can relate!

The best way I have made friends is through joining moms groups through meetup.com.  I have made a few friends/acquaintances that way.  I also suggest joining a playgroup that meets weekly--maybe you could find or start one on the weekends if that works better for your schedule.  Or find a gym class that meets weekly.  Or a bookclub.  Or take a class yourself.  I think the important thing is to see the same people over and over again frequently--like in a class.

But the reality is that most people in their 30s already have all the friends and family they need.  I found it very difficult to make friends here because everyone is so crazy busy and just don't have the time or interest.  [b]Our neighborhood is unfriendly and neighbors are not interested in getting to know us. [/b] My husband hasn't been able to make any friends here--not at work or though sports.   It's really hard!  I am hoping to finally find a sense of community once my kids are in school.[/quote]

I have heard this many times about certain close in neighborhoods.  Some neighbors just want to know your business, and will not share anything about themselves; which is not exactly a welcoming attitude.  And some people are just plain rude.  You can say hi until you are blue in the face, and they will look right through you with a hideous smug grin;  priding themselves on their unfriendly rudeness.   I would bet they spin stories with the best of them! Such a sad life. OP, believe me when I tell you it is not you. You want no part of Peyton Place; and people who have that kind of time (and hate!) on their hands, looking to deflect onto potential targets.

I personally think the playground is a great start.  It is just as random as anything else, and you might meet some funny, accomplished, warm people.  You really only need a few friends here, and a few there; pretty soon there are more and more.  Be choosy.  GL.   [/quote]

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