Reply to How do I deal with this? SN son not invited to party but he thinks he is

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[quote=Anonymous]BTDT parent here.  I tend to be honest with my kid - "I'm sorry honey.  I'm sure Larla thought you were invited but you weren't.  So, you won't be going."  I don't plan a special alternative - but then, I have three kids and an already busy schedule and, frankly, this sort of thing happens repeatedly for some kids, including one of mine.  Yes, it's disappointing for him and I wish it wasn't.  I am gentle with him when I give him the bad news.  But, I figure that at some point he needs to understand the social issues - you have to be invited, invitations come through letter or evite, not everyone gets invited to everything, and sometimes people make mistakes by telling you that their mom sent an invitation when she did not.  And, I cannot (and will not) make up for every non-invite or disappointment by taking my son out on a date.

I only have one kid that is still in the birthday party age range and I can say that the disappointment of not being invited is not a long lasting issue.  In fact, I am the one who remembers them, not my son.

OP, I'm sorry.  I hope this is not the start of an experience you will face repeatedly.  But, given that it might be, one thing I would suggest is that you not set yourself up for the expectation that you will be able to fix it.  [/quote]

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