Reply to S/O what kind of woman neglects the physical and emotional needs of her spouse

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am one of the PPs who has issues with the "entitled to sex" posters. I do not at all disagree that sexual intimacy is a healthy and necessary component of a good marriage, or that it can be incredibly damaging psychologically and emotionally to be sexually rejected, especially over a long period of time, by the person who is supposed to love you.

&lt;snippage&gt;

As the PP says, there is a lot of middle ground between "never" and "constantly" having sex. When you start throwing in obligations, it turns the whole conversation transactional and coercive, and that's not okay with me. [/quote]

I'm PP @10:47 and one of the people you quoted.

Here's my thing: I don't think anybody is "entitled" to sex-on-demand at any time from any particular person.  But we are entitled to have passionate intimacy in our lives.  If you don't want passionate intimacy with me, that's OK - it's absolutely your body and your right to say no, married or not - but that doesn't [i]entitle[/i] you to force me to be celibate - [b]your control over your body doesn't trump my control over mine[/b].  I remain free to go seek out the passionate intimacy I want with someone else - sure, maybe after a divorce.

The huge problem with that "middle ground" is that's the passive aggressive "duty sex" zone: Oh, honey, you can't complain about not getting sex...I lubed up and bent over the bed for you to use my body as a masturbation aid for fifteen minutes last week...we're not due for this week's appointment yet.  I'm not actually verbally saying no, but I'm letting you know you touching me makes my skin crawl.  Thanks but no thanks...I'd rather pay a hooker for fake sex.  I really don't want to have sex you unless you actually want to have sex with me and are turned on by me.  I'm a big boy and have moved beyond jacking off to playboy...I'd rather have  real sex with a real person.  [/quote]

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