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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again. Surreal is a good word. Just at a complete loss of what to do almost, and it's not like those things I know she wants are really going to fix anything. I'd be thrilled if they did, but I think if we get there she will look up and be in the same place.

She might not even have admitted this to herself. [/quote]
[b]
Why not try doing those things she wants? I know you don't think they will help, and maybe they won't, but if you want your fix your marriage as much as you say you do, isn't it worth a try? It kind of feels like you're telling yourself this as an excuse so you don't have to actually do anything differently.[/quote][/b]

This.  Exactly this.[/quote]

+1 from me, as well.  OP- you seem like a whiny bitch.  "It'll never work..." "crying out"  "what if there's no love waiting for me"...

Listen, my dude: Love isn't just sitting around waiting for your ass.  Love is a verb, it is an action that requires WORK on your part. Especially if you've screwed up in some major way(s), which you kinda sorta admit that you have (though how is anyone's guess).  Get to work![/quote]

EXACTLY!  It always amuses me when people say, "Oh no, I have no one, I can't believe this happened!"  Um, HELLO?!  It's all your doing!  If you are serious about wanting a good relationship, you can't expect it to just fall in your lap.  It's time to commence the foot rubs, the communication, taking her out to dinner, doing nice things for her, focusing on her.  If this is too tall of an order for you, then admit you aren't willing to do the work instead of sitting around with a "poor little old me" attitude. [/quote]

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