Reply to Men Should Be Aggressive Except When They Shouldn't

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Inspired by the "I wish he'd grab my face and kiss me" thread. A lot of women want guys to be assertive and aggressive sexually. A lot of them don't want to have to tell the guy to be this way because it ruins the effect if they have to say something. The guy should just want them so much, he just has to have her.

However, it has to be the right guy doing this. A creep being assertive and aggressive is beyond awful. Rapists have also poisoned the water. They work on the edges of plausible deniability, and take advantage of women's more passive role in the dating/sex game to force themselves on unwilling women or women so drunk (sometimes made that way by the predator) they are unable to give any kind of meaningful consent. So, women have pushed for tools and social norms that will hopefully make these predators accountable and offer some level of protection to women. Unfortunately, these tools and social norms have also blunted the inclination of a lot of good dudes to pursue women assertively.  Sometimes a woman might give a "soft no" which non-rapists have been conditioned to regard at face value when the woman really meant "try harder."

So, ladies, when you want a guy to come on strong, do you give recognizable signals? Do you have trouble figuring out when, in response, guys are uninterested as opposed to simply oblivious? Does it make the flirting/courtship process less fun if you have to be obvious? Other thoughts?[/quote]

That poster wasn't sending signals to her husband. She TOLD him that she wanted him to grab her face and kiss her.

How about you ask your woman what she wants?[/quote]

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