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[quote=Anonymous]I had like no boyfriends until late 20's. Got married at age 35 and had a kid at 37 and one at 41 (without any help). I'm not fat, but was very shy and introverted.  So, large problems can be overcome. I met my husband online, but not on a dating site.  I'm sure she's well aware of her problems and doesn't need to be told the obvious. If I had to do things over, I would have joined a dating site, but I was afraid to.  It's slim pickins in the late 30's.  The good ones are married, the good looking ones are gay. :) Some men take more time to mature, like a fine wine. She needs to find one of those. I know a couple guys who got married and had kids around 40. I also know several other people who never married who otherwise seemed like good catches.  Sometimes I think I was happier when I was single.  I think her weight is to keep people at a distance. She probably could benefit from counseling because maybe she is an emotional eater.  And a gym membership could do wonders too. She needs to find a man like yesterday, and get married in like 2 years.  Or, at the latest in 5 years but then she may only be able to have one kid. Her weight is also an issue for being healthy and fit enough to carry a child and raise it. It requires lots of energy.  She has other options: forget having kids, and just get married at any age she can, forget finding a man and go to a sperm bank, freeze her eggs for later on the off chance she finds a man, adopt a child, or forget having kids and finding a man and find a new life goal like world travel or physical fitness.  And then "when you least expect it", she'll probably find a man and/or have a kid or two if she is lucky.  At some point I realized it was better to try to get in a relationship and fail, than to not try at all.  Instead of telling her what she needs to do, just let her talk to you about it. Be there for her and listen without pressuring her.  Maybe life will not turn out the way you hope for her, but hopefully she can salvage some sort of happy existence one way or another. And another thing, more men will be available when they are divorced.  She could find a divorced man that already has kids if she doesn't make it in time to have her own. All is not lost yet, but the main thing she needs to do is get healthy.[/quote]

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