Reply to how much to give as present for bar mitzvah?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I came to this post for some guidance on this topic and am more confused that ever.

Should we give $54 or $108? More? We are not wealthy by any stretch and are a bit financially strained at the moment. I'm just trying to determine what's "appropriate."

Adding additional information that was raised in previous posts:
--I would say we are close, non-Jewish (Muslim) friends of the family. 
--My youngest daughter will be in the ceremony and my husband will be assisting with set up for the reception. 
--The father is barely pulling off this event bc mom was diagnosed with an illness half-way into planning and has since had to stop working.

This question is a bit stressful, as over-thinking it is detracting from our excitement to witness this rite of passage event for this wonderful boy.
[/quote]

Since your family is assisting with the setup and the ceremony, given your financial situation I would do $36 or $54 if you could do so comfortably. In your friend's shoes I would think that $108 was incredibly, unexpectedly generous of you. That's closer to the realm of what distant family or friends close enough to be almost family would give. Honestly since they're your friends they probably really appreciate that you're there to celebrate with them and help them, and whatever monetary gift you give will be above and beyond. Don't overthink it. Just pick a multiple of 18 that works with your current budget and then concentrate on being happy for the child.[/quote]

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