Reply to Practically 9 year old expressing wanting to be vegetarian but barely eats already- how to sway?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I smell a pre-eating disorder too in this story, but something about the OP's tone-- "I will not let her wither away"--also smells to me like a major control battle is underway. Your DD does have a right to exert control over her life and choices of food are one way children express this control. Some anorexia research suggests that OCD pathology is closely connected. I am saying all of this to encourage OP to find ways that are not about power to address this problem.

What if you saw a therapist together? Have someone neutral arbitrate essentially the discussion and help you come up with solutions. [/quote]

You've gotten some great advice here about having DD make a list of foods, or research how she'll get her Vit B12, D, iron, and all of those ideas are good ones--except they require you give final approval.

I agree with this poster: If you and DD are having a control struggle, maybe you already have a long history of food struggles already, you need to bring in outside advice to help you both find a win-win solution. Digging in or forcing her to go through a lot of hoops that ultimately end in your saying "nope, sorry, no dice" are all going to drive your D into more extreme behavior. If you're "lucky" that might be anorexia; if you're less lucky that might be much worse. So I think you both need an outside expert to change the underlying dynamic here.[/quote]

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