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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I think your request is reasonable and your questions are valid.  You deserve to have a happy sex life with your spouse and your needs are very normal.  Keep working at it.

To those posters who think she is controlling, I don't get it.  Do you expect her to stay unsatisfied for her entire married life and not even try to get her husband to respond to her in a way she needs? He is controlling her by demanding intimacy his way only.  That is not fair.  He should be willing to compromise.

IMHO[/quote]

Thank you so much. I appreciate your post as it expresses what I've been trying but unable to get across.

Also, I took my own advice & went back to re-read the posts. To the one that said most had been understanding, yes, you're correct and thank you for mentioning it. After I thought about it, I considered that maybe I'd missed something. Why would you say that if it wasn't the way it seemed to you? Several of the posts I missed, b/c it appears they posted while I was creating my post, and a few others were on a new page that I missed. In addition, looking back through, even some of those that I initially took to be criticizing actually weren't, so that's my mistake. This is a really touchy subject for me, and when the early responses came, there were some ugly ones. I immediately went on the defense & that mixed with the high level of emotion this incites for me clouded my perception. So to all of you who did try to offer helpful advice, thank you & to you I apologize. I got too distracted by the ones that were judgmental and mean. I think I just need to clear my head & calm down. It's emotional & letting that get the better of me certainly won't help either. I'll just try to talk to him again from the "what can I do to help" stance vs. "what happened". I can see how that might sound like I'm putting him at some kind of fault, which I've been trying to avoid.

Thanks again to the ones that tried to help. I appreciate you taking the time to put some suggestions out there. There were several that gave a different perspective, which helps a lot. Maybe now, with those things in mind, I can reach out to him in a way that's easier for him to respond to. [/quote]

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