Reply to Would You Remain Married If You Didn't Have Kids Together?

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Reply to "Would You Remain Married If You Didn't Have Kids Together?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am the first happy PP with five grown/nearly grown kids.  This thread is one of the saddest I've ever read on dcum... And that says a lot!

Are there really that few of us who are happily married?  Our children have given us immeasurable joy!  I adore them!  Being their mom has just been an amazing journey!  But my husband is my life partner.  My best friend in the world. The one I will grow old with. Time with our children is brief compared to the rest of our lives with our soul mate.

Seriously.  Your kids will grow up and leave.  It will happen faster than you can imagine.  If you aren't nurturing the relationship with your spouse now, 
you'll find there is no relationship once the kids are gone.  There is no luck or magic trick.  It takes hard work and a daily commitment to choose to love.

Love my kids, but my DH and I have always put our marriage first.  28 years and counting.....[/quote]

My spouse lets me do all the heavy lifting with the house and kids.  It has caused a deep rift in our relationship.[/quote]

May I say very gently -  You are choosing that.  If he truly will not help, then let it go.  Find a way to get past the resentment and just love.  My guess is that if you let go, cease with the nagging and passive aggressive behavior, he'll come around.  And if not, what have you lost?  If you are going to do everything by yourself, you might as well choose to do it in a loving way.[/quote]

I choose to resent him and cheat on him.[/quote]

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