Reply to H is not happy with sex only once a week

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I find it sad how many people on here seem to think it's okay to drive your husband away because he wants sex.

Sex isn't a power play in a relationship. It's something you give freely out of love and desire. It's a gift of intimacy that you give to your partner, but not one that you wield over their heads because they did to help you do the dishes or bathe the kids. It's an experience that is shared mutually. You don't lose by giving it.

It also doesn't require you to be in the rare mood that happens when Venus aligns with Pluto on a Saturday during  the equinox and it happened to be the day he trailed petals of flowers in hall all the way to the perfectly filled and candlelit bubble bath. It only requires you wanting to give  to your partner something only you can give them (well, alternative lifestyles notwithstanding). It requires you wanting to connect on a level that you don't share with anyone else on the planet. .. One that has no secrets, no shame, and is purely about pleasure.

OP, this man is saying that he finds YOU to be the most beautiful, erotic thing he sets his eyes on. He wants to pleasure you, and have you pleasure him. He doesn't want you to just be the gal who makes his lunch and does his laundry. What is he negative in that AT ALL? You turn him in, and he wants to express that WITH YOU.

Things have been lean because of career absences, etc. maybe the pressures are off now. Enjoy it. He considers you to be a hot thing that he wants to get it on with. So get it on, before he turns that energy elsewhere and you are just the sandwich maker. [/quote]

:roll:

Sex easily turns into a power play issue when the two partners have miss-matched libidos. It's not uncommon.

My DH would have sex twice a day, every day.  I don't find pleasure in that. My libido doesn't refresh that quickly. I want it once a week, max.

If I am not feeling it, he can go down on me for hours and do whatever I like best and I don't find pleasure in it. It's annoying, not pleasant.  I just want to smack him and say "STOP TOUCHING ME!"  An hour or more of annoying physical contact every day is NOT good for intimacy in a relationship, either.

So... we compromise. We have intercourse once a week, I provide him with a loving assist (blow job, hand job) a couple of times a week. [/quote]

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