Reply to Getting seperated...what is fair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote] His first idea was that I would move out and I would watch the kids for him until he could get home (sometimes not until 8 or 9 when he plays sports or whatever). Then, pick them up to go to school the next day. Basically, I was supposed to continue catering his schedule (raising the kids as usual), but also get a second job and live elsewhere. [/quote]

This is so absurd and bizarre and self-serving that I almost can't believe it's real (but I do believe you, OP). 
anyone who proposes this as "fair" is not a good candidate for collaborative divorce.

Time to stop worrying over why he's doing what he's doing (anxiety, job, whatever). Doesn't matter anymore. He made a unilateral decision to break up the family and create financial hardship. He's got to take responsibility for that.

Yes, 50/50 custody is the presumption but you can have joint legal without having 50% joint physical. In his case, it doesn't sound like he really wants to be a 50% time dad. But be careful: the amount of support you get often depends on how much time the kids are with you vs him.

are you sure your house is still underwater?

please do look into ALL the debt accrued, and go over finances, credit reports, etc. He sounds like he might have been planning this a while and could have been taking money aside quietly.

hate to say it, but you need a good lawyer and yes, it will cost you.[/quote]

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