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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A cautionary tale... Years ago I searched my 17yo DDs room for what I suspected was pot. I didn't find any. DD was furious with me. 
The next night after coming home from work I went into my room and was mortified to find my sex toys and porn VHS tapes had been dumped on my pillow. 
I never searched her room again. [/quote]

:shock: [/quote]

Wow.  What a horrible child.  The level of entitlement involved in that is staggering to me.  I would have a really hard time having her in my home after she turned 18 if she did that.[/quote]

Agree with second poster.  That's hilarious but, totally unacceptable.  YOUR house.  YOUR rules.  Your porn.  Even if you smoked pot, if your rule is she can't, then she can't.  She can decide for herself when she is 18.

Poster whose kid dumped your toys, what is your relationship like now?[/quote]

A PP who is the parent of 4 teens.  See...I see this differently.  I do not think what the PP's DD did was even about rules and it turns out that the DD was following them - the PP did not find any weed.  What the DD objected to was the room search, having her room tossed like an inmate's cell and her mom's lack of trust.   It was more of a "let's see how you like it" type thing.  I am sorry but being falsely accused of something is no fun and having your belongings rummaged through is no fun either.  Add to that this not a a 12YO - this is a 17YO.  Absent other evidence, I would NOT call this child an entitled brat or a horrible child.   And trust me, you would not have to worry about that kid hanging around after 18.  She will want to be out as soon as she could get out.

I ge that there are no instruction manuals for parenthood and it is trial and error the whole way.  I have made my sahre of mistakes both by being too restrictive and too lax at times.  It is a delicate balance that we do not always achieve.  But a teen's room is their sanctuary.  If you have probable cause to search it for something harmful - you should do it.  But please do not search it willy nilly. It IS a big deal! [/quote]

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