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[quote=Anonymous]There are families who make a conscious choice to use corporal punishment on very young kids, and may calmly slap their hand or pop their leg.  It's not something I'd ever consider doing, but it's not abuse and CPS will not intervene.

But what the OP is describing, which is a parent losing it and doing something they didn't intend to do and instant regret is entirely different.  It's abuse, and has the potential to grow out of control very very fast.  I'm glad that OP's SIL gets help, and hope that the BIL takes it seriously and doesn't leave mom and baby alone.  In addition, I'd encourage the OP to think in terms of providing whatever amount of support you'd be able to provide if the mom was unable to care for the baby alone due to physical rather than mental illness.  By this I mean that if the mom was suddenly hit by a car and couldn't hold the baby due to broken arms, or was hospitalized due to breast cancer, or had a stroke with the risk of seizures and wasn't safe to care for the baby alone, the family would probably rally around and gather resources and look for solutions that still gave baby and mom access to each other, rather than thinking about taking the baby away.  Hopefully people will realize here that this situation is just as much of a crisis, and just as much not the mom's fault as the situations I describe.[/quote]

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