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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I understand all the reasons that people would explore this as an option, but I personally cannot get past the extremely colonialist mindset that says it's perfectly okay for a wealthy Western to go to a developing country and pay 1/3 the American price tag for a poor woman to carry a child for them. I also cannot get past the obvious and very real issues with the way that many parts of Indian culture treat women and girls. I would never be able to be 100% sure that the surrogate was not being coerced in some fashion.

I know that the same sort of economic coercion happens in the US and that surrogacy and adoption are by and large a luxury industry that people do not engage with unless they have the resources to do so. But given the colonial history of India and the gender issues that are pervasive in Indian society, I would personally not be comfortable with it and would have a hard time respecting friends of mine who chose that route, but that's a result of my personal politics and I don't know anyone personally who has chosen an Indian surrogate, so it's largely theoretical for me.[/quote]

I'm the PP who posted the info a about clinics. We felt the same way, so are doing a GC here in the YS. Our funds are limited and it may mean that we don't get our baby, but we just weren't comfortable with the India option. It's impossible to know if the women are being coerced or not, and the agencies we talked to don't allow any contact between you and the surrogate. That was a major red flag to me.[/quote]

The agency my friends worked with not only allowed it, they encourage it. They met regularly during the pregnancy and my friend's Indian parents would visit her frequently, and vice-versa. A year later, they celebrate holidays together. They have sort of become relatives. 
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I looked into two agencies and for both you could and were encouraged to meet the surrogate, Skype with the surrogate etc…  I mean how could you even do this if you never even met the woman!  I think people just haven't researched this and don't know what they are talking about.  You are really going to just say, "oh yes, you pick a woman for me, anyone is fine… let me know when the baby is born."  It's not that simplistic!  We were encouraged to develop a relationship with the surrogate. The surrogates could either live in their home town ( which you would go visit) or they would live in housing near the clinic for the duration of the pregnancy ( with their families).  I ended up not going this route because i finally was able to carry a pregnancy, but Indian surrogacy was the path we were headed for.  I think PP's comments are very accurate.  Most people seemed to keep a relationship with the surrogate.

Also, American women do not get paid that much for surrogacy.  The majority of the money goes to lawyer fees.  An Indian woman makes far more money being a surrogate than an American woman if you account for the different economies and typical wages.  Many women Indian women feel so lucky to have the opportunity.  And many Indians look down on it… that is true too.  When I talked to people who had done it, I witnessed American women who were so grateful they were able to have their own child after so many struggles and Indian women who were so grateful to have the opportunity to be a surrogate.  I'm sure there are exceptions to this, but if you really check out these clinics and meet people then you would likely have a very different opinion on it.  When someone first told me about Indian Surrogacy, i thought it sounded ridiculous… why would i do that when i could find a surrogate in the US.  However, after years of failed fertility treatments, lost pregnancies and dead-ends with adoption, this was such a beautiful light at the end of the tunnel.  And I literally got pregnant as we were making plans to do this.  Im just so glad this option is out there for women.[/quote]

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