Reply to I want to fall out of love with a married man.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"Tell his wife"?  For what?  That is the dumbest advice I've ever heard.

Just move on with your life.  No need to destroy his or hers.[/quote]

The wife's life has already been destroyed - the destroying actions have already happened. Telling her isn't destroying her life, it is just showing her basic respect so that she isn't in the dark about what is happening in her own marriage. To let her make informed decisions about her own personal health and get tested for sexually transmitted diseases?

I have never understood the whole 'don't tell'. If your parent died would you want your family to not tell you because telling you would be hurtful. Should they just deal with the death and funeral behind your back and lie to you so that they don't hurt you with the truth. The death has already happened - Would you really rather not know and just go on blissfully while everyone else knows and are making decisions about your life that you aren't apart of? Would you really feel that someone's intentions in telling you about a family death were to hurt you and destroy your life - and you would get angry at them, preferring to they just kept lying to you to cover to keep you in the dark?

Not telling is just cowardly.

[/quote]

Oh please, that's ridiculous. Telling her IS destroying her life. It is also an obvious act of selfishness - i.e., it's about YOU not about her.

If you are the "other woman" you don't even get to talk about "showing her basic respect". You've already totally failed on that front. What you should do now is just go away.

If my parent died, I wouldn't want the murderer to be the one who told me about it, since very obviously the purity of that person's motives in telling me would be highly suspect to say the least.[/quote]

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