Reply to Some old colleague of my dh crossed the line

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[quote=Anonymous]It could still be harmless; the DH might just be trying to avoid the awkwardness of going from daily contact to no contact. (not that he's right to do so, but sometimes relationships don't end cleanly, they sort of spittle out)

And DH is probably enjoying the attention--even in a smooth marriage, it's a fun surprise to get noticed, and if you're in a stressed-out marriage, it's even more of a lure.

And in general, guys like to fix things and be needed, and here is a woman with a problem and is asking for his ear and advice…very appealing for someone who may be feeling a bit neglected by DW.

So DW, IMO the best thing to do is to start focusing on DH in a positive way ASAP!  Fill those holes in his ego with YOUR fixes.

And briefly, without emotion, get a quick conversation with him so you are both on the same page re his contact with this woman.

Finally, I do not agree that in some future time if you want to be friends again with this person, and she is more stable in her life, then to do so.  She's shown bad character--she's shown she is willing to cross a line--and you must protect your cherished asset, your DH, your family.  People don't change very often, and you don't really want to take a risk to find out if she's changed or not.

Your time is limited; fill it with people with good character.[/quote]

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