Reply to My DH occasionally binge drinks and drives w/ kids in car

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, how come you're not addressing everyone who is giving you concrete and sound advice?  you're only defending yourself.  I'll summarize for you the sound advice you got(and add some of my own):

1.  you become sole driver of your kids.  You act like you're a single parent.  You get to aftercare before him, you drive them to functions.
2.  You do not let your DH take kids out of the house when he's drinking.  Again, you behave as if you're a single parent.  Co-exist with him in the house for the time being.
3.  Go to Al-Anon.  They will give you advice to stop enabling your DH - and their advice won't be "leave and get a good lawyer"  it'll be things to say/do when he drinks.
4.  If he resists your actions to drive kids everywhere you call the police.  They will determine if he's able to drive (and if he's able to take the kids in his condition).
5.  Put the kids to bed yourself.  even if he starts drinking after you've gone to bed, there should be no reason for DH to be taking care of your DC alone after you've gone to bed.  You are responsible for your kids.  Feed them, dress them, put them to bed.  That would stop this "he's cold at the top of the stairs" shit.

you seem to be ignoring these posts and only starting to argue with people that are judging you.  You need to put your big girl panties on and take care of your kids.  You don't need to either leave him or let him drive the kids - there's a middle ground here that will protect your kids.  [/quote]

You seem to missing the point.  You are assuming that my DH will agree to all this.  I can tell you he will not.  And the reason DH ends up with DC alone after I'm asleep is that we have a child who is AUTISTIC.   If you don't know, most autistic children have sleeping issues.  They wake and wander every night.  Yes, we see a doctor.  Yes, it is being medically managed as best as possible.  I cannot call the police about my sober husband driving my children.  And the police will do nothing unless they actually see him driving under the influence and if I call and give them license plates and location and they don't find him?   It does no good to call once he is home.  I've tried that, remember?

I have read al anon literature but do plan to start attending now.

I do not understand how you are suggesting I enforce any of this without risking him getting even more unsupervised time with the children.[/quote]

Okay, OP, since you're dead set on ignoring everyone's advice (despite posting here in the first place), try this thought exercise:

Assume that your husband DOES get in an accident and kill someone as a result of driving drunk. He will, at that point, go to jail. You will, I would HOPE, divorce him. Who drives your kids around then? Who gets up in the night when your autistic child wanders?

Maybe implement that plan now, instead of waiting.

If your husband is unwilling to address your concerns with his drinking, that says worlds about how much he respects your opinion. [/quote]

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