Reply to I have a sexless and loveless marriage. Ask me anything

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, here's a question you haven't answered. do you WANT the marriage to work? Eg, would you be happy with this marriage if you husband got home earlier on fridays and had sex more frequently? Is that enough? is he a loving, generous kind person in general?

DH and I have a lot of problems and frustrations. But, he loves me. He doesn't always show it the right way, and he can be an ass, and a slob, and lazy. But I know in my heart of hearts he really cares about me and wants us to have a happy, close marriage. It doesn't sound like your husband feels that way, or is even capable of feeling that way right now. Was it always like this? Did something change and if so, when? Does he express dissatisfaction with the marriage in direct (rather than indirect) ways?

I have to say that your posts sound so hopeless. You have one life to live. I'd give it one more shot with DH, but initiate therapy and exploring separation. I'd rather be stressed, but free, than constantly reminded of how much I am unloved. there are terrible consequences to divorce, too, including custody issues, but things sound pretty dire. [/quote]

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