Reply to What's wrong with me - help me please. (I'm angry...)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm angry all the time, and I can't identify why.  I'm married with a 7 and 4 year old, a SAHM.  Thankfully my kids are healthy, DH has a good job (tho with really very long hours - counsel at a big firm).  We have a nice home.  Etc.

But the last few weeks (months?) I've been really angry and I don't know why. Like for ex., taking the kids to the grocery store today when the kids are "can I have this?" and grabbing stuff when that's annoying to everyone, it makes me almost shake with anger but also sadness, like tears in my eyes. Like I can't deal, I'm losing it.  I'm snappy with kids, sometimes DH.  It's like my rope is FRIED.  But I can't figure out what I feel angry at.

I exercise a few times a week, eat pretty healthily.  I try to sleep well but often wake up multiple times per night (though fall asleep ok). I even got bloodowrk checking thyroid and that's fine, as are other things like Vit D.  I seem healthy.  Please help me, I don't know what's wrong with me.  [/quote]

OP - what do you do for you?  I'd imagine your husband's long hours make for very little "you time".  What do you do that isn't kid-related, marriage-related, house-related?

By all means, see a doctor.  Maybe you need meds on a long-term basis, or maybe just some short-term meds can help.  Consider your diet, if you'd like.  I've not found any link between my depression and my diet, but YMMV.  I'd strongly suggest a counselor.  Getting to the root of what made me angry (a lack of time to myself and identity outside of mother/wife) was more helpful than any other remedy.  Yes, you have nice things.  Yes, you're "doing it all right".  That doesn't mean that's enough to make you happy.[/quote]

Hi, this is OP.  I have very little for me.  I haven't physically seen my husband since Sunday, and won't tonight either.  I know it's a HUGE part of it.  Admittedly he does nothing besides work and pay bills, I do EVERYTHING from grill to clean to take out the trash to everything, and he would agree.  I think 95% of the time I can deal, the other 5% I lose my shit.[/quote]

PP who tried to tread carefully.  I figured as much.  It's completely understandable that you would feel like this, and it sounds like you need to figure out how to make the situation work better for you - whether that be taking a weekend and going away with friends, finding more time for yourself while the kids are at school, hiring people to help with household tasks, assigning DH tasks to do while at work (like make phone calls or order food from peapod or whatever can be done remotely), getting help during the week from a teenager or babysitter, talking to DH about cutting back on his hours (or at least coming home at x o'clock y days a week), or instituting a weekly date night.    My guess is that even if you do nothing it will get better as the kids get older, but you owe it to yourself (and your family) to try to address the issue now before you become majorly resentful.  Good luck.

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