Reply to Is it rude to invite people to the pool but make them pay the guest fee?

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Reply to "Is it rude to invite people to the pool but make them pay the guest fee?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
Not the OP, but we do not have $15 in "some other part of our family budget" to host guests at the pool. My kids don't go to camp, we don't eat out, we don't pay to go to kids' shows or movies, we don't take family vacations, we don't have cable TV: the pool is what we do in the summer and there is no "other part" of our family budget to host guests on a regular basis. Believe what you want to believe, but not everyone just writes off the pool as one more thing among many that we're spending our enormous piles of money on. We do have one couple with whom we are longtime friends and with whom we regularly get together for dinner; in the summer those get-togethers often happen at our pool and we do pay for them. However, that relationship is one where we are often sharing the buying of food or beer/wine, so that is already built into the dynamic of our relationship.
 
I am happy to offer someone access to our pool that they would not already have, but I'm clear that's what I'm offering, not a "playdate" in the sense that we have an obligation to pay. Truthfully, the kids are hardly ever in the same place at the same time when we're at the pool, so it's very different than hosting at someone's house. 
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Well, I am coming at it from the perspective of someone who doesn't do those things and also doesn't have half a grand to spend on a pool membership.  If you have have spent all or most of your budget that half-grand pool membership, just be very upfront that you expect people to pay so that they can decline and arrange something else with you.  Frankly, I cannot understand why people feel that "access" to their private pool is something that other people should be clammoring for.  There are many lovely public pools in this area.  
If I owned a share in a petting zoo (which I don't), it would seem very strange to me (and rude) to say to a friend, "hey, would you and your family like to join us at our petting zoo?  $5 each."   But to each their own.  Obviously some people don't feel it is rude, and if someone else wants to pay a fee for an invite, it is a free country.[/quote]

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