Reply to If you are (or have) a stepmom . . . (long message)

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[quote=Anonymous]My dad remarried when I was around 11 or so. His wife was a miserable, hateful person to my mother and made life very difficult for me for about 12-15 years. I used to cringe (and mentally stab her to death) whenever she introduced us as "our children" or "my daughter". Um, no, you're my step monster, not my mother, thank you very much!

Fast forward another five years when all the kids had grown up and grandchildren began arriving. She has turned into an entirely different person. She adores our kids and is wonderful to them. I still cringe when she introduces me as her daughter but I don't at all kind when she introduces my kids as her grandkids. It has everything to do with the relationship we've all had with each other. She was never a mother to me, whereas my real mom was a solid rock for me during the most turbulent of times. But my stepmom has always been a grandma to my kids - behaving as you'd expect a grandparent to behave and raising no ruckus.

So - for me, it comes down to relationships. Given the vicious behavior of my stepmom toward my real mom, I could never call my stepmom "mom" or "my parents" as that just doesn't sit right. She never played the caring role of a parent. So she's my stepmom and always will be in any introduction. (Unless it's regarding the grandkids, in which case she's just grandma.)[/quote]

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