Reply to Does Low Libido= Lack of Attraction?

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[quote=Anonymous]Woman here. I'm 42 and am coming off a year of incredible hormonal fluctuations. I am horny all the time.  My dh and I have sex 5-6 times a week, and I initiate more than half the time. Before this year, it was more like 3-4 times a month and it felt like a chore. I totally get what a pp said about the all day slow burn. My husband can touch me now and in one minute, I'm like, let's go. What I have learned this year is that a woman has to come to bed already a little turned on, especially in long term relationships where familiarity can kill the passion. You can't wait for your dh to warm you up. You have to take responsibility for your own desire. I watch sexy movies or scenes (usually not porn) and read erotica to get myself going. Also, I think women are not so great at recognizing the subtle signs that they want sex. There's always something else to be done or organized or whatever. We have multi-tasking minds and it really can be hard to let it all go and focus on one thing. So, yes, OP, a year ago I would have said my low libido was mainly due to my lack of sexual attraction to my dh. Now, I know it's a case of recognizing and cultivating my own imagination and taking advantage of the impulse when it arises. Bonus: we get along better now than we have in a long, long time, and we are really affectionate outside the bedroom. I feel so much more connected to him. [/quote]

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