Reply to My fantasy is to be a loner who just hangs out with my pets and my plants and my books

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sounds like a nice life.

But if you are such a loner, and you love a life in solitude, why did you get married? 
Your love for your spouse must be really strong for you to give up your dream life.

I hope you will have your dream life soon! [/quote]

Being married or having a child is very, very different from attending social events with acquaintances, colleagues, and neighbors. They are in some ways the opposite. When I am at work functions or school functions where I have to make polite small talk and put on a certain mask (where I appear pleasantly neutral no matter what is actually going on in my life), I often crave being at home or with my close friends with whom I don't have to wear that mask and can simply be myself. With my family, in particular, I can sit in comfortable silence or share feelings that are bigger or more complicated than would be appropriate to express at a neighborhood barbecue or a PTO meeting. But also with friends there is a much broader range I can express. And they also are more expressive and open with me, they don't just limit themselves to their blandest and most publicly acceptable selves.

As I get older, I enjoy solitude and those very authentic interactions with people close to me. Generic and polite small talk with near strangers? I'm over it. I've done it for decades. I would like to retire from it.[/quote]

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