Reply to Is it weird that I don’t fear getting old at all and I’m actually kind of looking forward to it?

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Reply to "Is it weird that I don’t fear getting old at all and I’m actually kind of looking forward to it?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I still have to cook for everyone. I feel like being 50ish is a pretty bad age tbh: empty nest but kids still so demanding and home a lot, aging parents with so many issues, and in my head I am selfish and don't want to take care of anyone but myself. Much much harder for me than the little kid years and no freedom like in my early 20s.[/quote]

I still think it’s different than the kids being home every day. Also, please don’t think it’s your obligation to take care of your parents. I have made sure I have enough assets and plans in place where my kids will never have to take care of me. I think it’s such a burden on children and I simply don’t think it’s fair. People should not have kids with the hope that they will take care of them when they are old. [/quote]

It's great you did that but my in-laws did no and dh will not abandon them so we'll have to at least help a lot logistically. I really meant more in terms of health worries though.

And as far as kids, this stage is different but imo it is actually more work and less enjoyable than even the high schools years: they are home much more when they are home (off school, dirtying the house all day long every day, eating so much food it is crazy). And sure, they will help if asked but it's not truly helpful because they still create much more work and want to do things on their timeline. For instance dd offered to go get groceries but that's happening when she feels like it after this and that and I'll need the groceries earlier.

It's all really surprised me because I thought being an empty nester was supposed to be great. It's really not: it's phone calls every day when things are not good, listening to their problems all the time (but of course, don't give advice because as mentioned on the adult children today as well, they just want to complain and complain!), they don't call much when things are going well so you don't get the fun debriefs...And then when they are not home, it's this weird feeling of freedom but not quite because so much money goes to them still so it's not like we don't have to be careful about our own spending. Idk...it sucks for me. Enjoy your little kids while you can!!! I sure did and I miss those years.[/quote]

Why on Earth are you funding your adult children's lifestyle? That's...a choice.[/quote]

They are both college kids. [/quote]

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