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[quote=Anonymous]OP I am with you 100% and have posted about my own psycho mother, but I do want to ask, what you mean that your mom helped your sibling with kids? Personality disordered people usually don't do much.I too lived bear parents and I wouldn't say they really helped much.

They expected us for holidays and didn't make it a choice. First they made it clear they would not babysit, but then when they saw the kids gave them more attention when we weren't there, they wanted to babysit, but not change diapers and not for very long and not often. We could barely go to a closeby meal and occasionally they called during it. They expected the kids to be little dolls they could show off to their friends. They also had little tasks for us. Now they were a number we could use on emergency contact forms, but if we ever used mom, I'd never here the end of it. Of course, mom played martyr about what an amazing support she was even though they did not help in any dire situations and we were called for many emergencies.

So, really it was much easier to hire a babysitter or any help we needed and pay for the freedom from emotional bondage, guilt trips and this insistence we kiss the ring over and over again.

My point is....if she has a personality disorder, I don't think there was help there and many of us delude ourselves we can create a warm family. Your sister doesn't deserve this, but she has to be willing to set her own boundaries and outsource it all.[/quote]

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