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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is not about academics, but behavior and manners. You can identify a public school kid based on how they behave. [/quote]

Yeah, public school kids are nicer and don’t bully people because their families make less than $1M/year.[/quote]

Parent of Bx Sci and Stuy here.
There IS a difference culturally. My Asian kids would joke that there are a lot of NPCs at their school (non playable characters). I guess it means those kids are devoid of personalities and or extremely awkward. Most of them are from Brooklyn or Queens. 
And no, they are not necessarily nicer when you get to know them. 
The truth is there is a lack of social polish but that has to do with parental influence and upbringing - not something inherent to these kids.
The same goes for even the really low tier privates. I did some mentoring at an all boys catholic private way up in the bronx and those boys had that scrappy side to their interactions with people. 
It isnt a public/private divide but a secure and insecure divide. 
I[/quote]

Yes. And the problem is that these kids often lean into their NPC (love that term - thanks) - characteristics. They stick together and act like they get some joke that no one else gets while the joke is on them. If it was just a few of them it is one thing but their presence is non-trivial, particularly at Stuy. So though a smart, well-adjusted kid will definitely find their crowd at one of these schools (and note that there are smart, well-adjusted kids of all races, wealth levels, boroughs, etc.), they cannot avoid having to spend their days dealing with these types.

My child got into one of these schools and just couldn't fathom the thought of spending four years in this environment - they visited and all of these "cool kids" were acting like they owned the place. My child came from a very diverse public school, but it was a different type of diversity. We are not wealthy but we have enough money that we were able to make private work, and found a place that is a good fit. We are almost definitely in the bottom half financially but have enough that we can play the game. I sometimes question our decision but overall I think it made for a happier HS experience for our child.[/quote]

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