Reply to Tips for dating with "niche looks" in my 40s

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dude, you are a catch. I think part of the problem may be the DC area. On the eastern shore of Md you would be quickly in a long term relationship.

On line dating has very low barriers to entry and as such can be a risky time consuming way to find a partner.

Understand a woman can breakup with someone on Saturday and be back on line on Monday but not be emotionally over her breakup.

Many women and men who are online dating go back to former partners and you have no way of knowing why they ghosted you. This is common when dating someone from 1-6 months. Many women are still married and divorcing when they are dating online. Many woman are angry at their former partners.

Many women who are just out of long term relationships or out of long term marriages are simply not emotionally available for a new long term relationship although they will swear up and down that they are.

I say this as a woman who dated online for 6 years.

I would really work hard at meeting women other ways since on line dating is not working.

Tell everyone you know that you are available and want to be fixed up. In addition to your friends tell acquaintances like the mailman or mail woman.

Read the Dale Carnegie book. It is somewhat dated as it was written in the 1930's but there are still things to be learned.

Sign up for Latin and Ballroom Dance classes.
Many times your local municipality will run these at $7 per person per night.  They are always short of men. They are fun and you will meet a lot of people.

Go clubbing.  One of my African American female employees has been dating a Baltimore Raven for about 4 years. I was really impressed she was dating an NFL player.  I asked her how they met.  She met him clubbing at a dive bar on the eastern shore where he grew up and she lived.

In my circle African American women are no more religious and/or church going than white women.  [b]Be open to African American women as well as others.[/b]

Don't overshare your dating history on date 1-3.  i.e. Keep things light.  Don't tell anyone you never get past 6 months.  It is ok to say I've had long term relationships. (6 months is long for many people.)

Be aware that if you are dating white women that white women will consider it a huge red flag that you have never been married or in long term relationships by your 40's.  I dated a late 40's never married guy and I kept wondering what was wrong with him.  It is unusual not to have been married once or twice by your 40's in the white culture.

I'm 5'6" female.  I'm sure you are already doing this since you are fit but make sure you always stand tall with your shoulders back. It makes a big difference.  I dated a guy who was 5'6" and he had really good posture. It made a huge difference.

Big picture, change up what you are doing.

You sound like a great guy.

[/quote]

This is so cringe! I pray no black woman gives him the time of day. [/quote]

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