Reply to Supporting colleague who discovered husband’s affair with a 19 year old

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Help her realize this does not have to destroy her life. [b]We've been culturally condition in the U.S. to think of this as some kind of ultimate betrayal.
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But in many cultures--France, Japan, etc., this kind of things is not uncommon or even so taboo. Help her to not overreact. Keep it in perspective.[/quote]

Are you the cheating husband?[/quote]

No. I just understand the fact that some kind of crazy overreaction only dissipates wealth and stability for the children. I married into a French family, and they think American divorce culture is basically like cutting off your nose to spite your face. Or, more like cutting off your kid's nose to spite your cheating husband. Who has the energy or the reservoir of spite like that?[/quote]

Well, the French are also much more OK with child sexual abuse, so I'm not sure their way of looking at love is one to emulate.  For me, aside from the cheating is the issue that it is with a 19 year old.  That really speaks to a guy who enjoys a power differential in a relationship, objectifies women and who is barely keeping his sexual interest on the legal side (and might not have always been able to do the latter or continue to be able to do it).  [/quote]

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