Reply to Ex moving to another country after kids turn 18

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's the harsh reality, OP.

My kids are nearly 21 and 23 now.

They are one reason I've kept my house even though I was interested in moving. I figured they needed a home to come home to.

The reality is, they're rarely here. Maybe a couple of weeks in May before they've gone off to work at camps or internships. Then at Christmas. They want to spend Spring Break with their friends.

My oldest graduated from university in May and moved to Manhattan. She's been home once or twice but she's settled in.

My youngest did study abroad over Christmas break. She split her time before she went between mine and her mother's.

I'm an empty nester now. I've basically been one since the youngest left for college about three months after her 18th birthday.

I have other reasons for needing to remain here now, but if I could move somewhere else, I absolutely would. It's not much difference for the kids to come visit me here or in some new place.

This is what an Empty Nest is like. You need to wrap your head around it. Life is an adventure. If their father moves overseas, they will go visit. I doubt they'll see a whole lot less of him than they do now. And they'll have a whole new area to explore.[/quote]

They live with mom, see dad what an hour or two a few times a week?  This is about OP, not the kids.  When they go home they will be with mom, not dad.  So in a week visit they will see dad twice for an hour and she expects him to stay close for that a few times a year?[/quote]

Are you slow? They won't be with the mother, either. They'll be starting their own lives. [/quote]

Are you just that mean your kids don’t come home?  Most go home holidays and summers and these kids would stay with mom, not dad.  [/quote]

No, I am saying that’s not true. Most are doing internships in summer and maybe study abroad over Christmas break. As they move through college the spend less and less time going home. Which is how it should be. [/quote]

No, home should always be their base and internships are usually near the parent’s homes to save cost.  But, mom has custody dad has visits so kids stay with mom so it’s a nonissue.    I’d expect my kids home summers and holidays and I’m not paying for trips during college. [/quote]

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