Reply to DD meeting her boyfriend’s parents for the first time, we are both REALLY worried

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your daughter needs to learn when it’s appropriate to joke, with whom it’s appropriate to joke, and about what it’s appropriate to joke. Going for a laugh is not more important than politeness, tact, and sensitivity. There’s also the factor of “nobody asked for your opinion.” She sounds rude and a bit boorish. And I say this as someone who usually likes to try to make people laugh.

Tell her to err on the side of being quieter at this first meeting. It’s not a vaudeville act, and she’s not auditioning for a role. Tell her to use it as an opportunity to see what the parents are like, and less to show them what she’s like. Also let her know that it’s not the opportunity for a political debate, and if the boyfriend’s parents express views she doesn’t like, she doesn’t need to respond or engage. She will not change their minds, and she will not give them food for thought to reconsider their views. Again, it’s a chance for her to gather intel about what the parents are like. [/quote]

You can gather much more intelligence if you're an active participan[b]t. She should find out just how bad they are. This is the perfect opportunity to bring up women's rights, immigration, healthcare, and income inequality[/b]. And then after meeting the parents, she'll figure out if the BF is any better.[/quote]

That's not the issue at play.  DH's daughter is not the one to "correct" the future in-laws.  AT ALL.  You libs are always so intolerant - and I'm not MAGA.  Listen to yourselves sometimes!  Gee, the issue is DD has never learned to control her impulses.  Sadly, it's a little late but mom needs to tell her to think twice before blurting stuff out.[/quote]

Why not? This is an opportunity to interview the parents to see if they're the kind of people she would want to be associated with.

I agree she's not not going to fiz them during this visit, but she can determine if they're even salvageable.

I really don't understand your attitude at all. If parents are as bad as the OP seems to imply, it is better for her to find out now so she can cut it off. Especially if the BF doesn't stand up to them. There's no benefit to dragging that out into a second or third visit.
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