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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Christmas isn’t the be all end all in our house.  If anything birthday’s are more important as they are more personal. [b]Our goal is to teach our kids to be appreciative generally so it doesn’t matter if they are getting things randomly throughout the year when needed or wanted or if they are getting them for a special occasion.[/b]

We review what’s needed or wanted and then make a determination when/if to get it and when to give.[/quote]

The bolded. My kids would be considered spoiled because they get pretty much what they want when they want. But they aren't "spoiled" because they are very appreciative, and very kind. They also are pretty disinterested in name brand things. Thank goodness. They are not superficial. Treats my DD likes are thrifting in a new city. [/quote]

People consider kids who get “what they want when they want” to be spoiled, even if they are appreciative and kind about what they get. I have to wonder how character is built if they always just get what they want easily and don’t have to work for it.[/quote]

Because that’s not the only way to teach and instill good character.  Also no one said that kids don’t have to work.  You teach character by exhibiting it, teaching and enforcing manners, introducing kids to other people, cultures, history.  You make them work at school, sports, activities,  jobs.  You teach them about saving for things they want (big or small) and then let them spend their own money so they can start to see the price of things.

Kids can be spoiled without being brats and while understanding their privilege is not necessarily everyone’s reality. And yes, sometimes you have to blatantly call them out when they seem to approach something with an overly privileged mentality but that’s called parenting.[/quote]

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