Reply to What consequences for a disrespectful kid?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t know about your kids, but when mine are doing activities sometimes they have 10-12 hour days between school and activities and THEN they have to do homework. I work 8 hours and sometimes have a little to do when I get home, but no I’m not working 10-12 hour days. And although several of those hours are sports or theater or whatnot and are seemingly fun for them, it’s still physical energy being spent as well as emotional energy navigating friendships and social situations and dealing with the whims of the adults in charge. On top of the stress of being a teen and getting into an amazing college by doing a gazillion activities and needing leadership roles etc etc…there’s a lot on our teens plates right now.

Think about how tired they must be and then their weekends need to be taken up by homework and chores….I would want to disassociate as well.

Gain back control by putting parental controls on the phone implement downtimes of the phone and limit social media apps when possible. Be clear with physical lists of what her household expectations are, but make sure you’re not putting too much on her. My teens are in charge of their own laundry and emptying the dishwasher every other day. No food allowed in their rooms and never has been allowed. A lot of other stuff we let slide. If their own rooms are messy—who cares? Just close your door. If they don’t hang up their coat, we remind them. Every so often I call a 5 minute everyone clean a common area family tidy—I set a timer and they know not to just linger in their rooms if they’re putting away an item, it needs to be a constant 5 minutes and then the common areas are a lot better. I’m not always diligent about everything so I don’t expect my teens to be, I don’t hold them to a higher standard.

Good luck op. You can do this.

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Op here. Thank you! I wish I knew you in person. You seem to have a good outlook and instead of just getting on me for screaming, you're actually giving constructive criticism with advice.

I apologized to her this morning for screaming yesterday and she was surprised and asked what was wrong with me. She seemed to be happy and it made me happy too. So unlike our usual Mondays when she is cranky and sulking :)

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