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[quote=Anonymous]You want your older child to basically be a mini adult who understands that your youngest has needs that take precedence over everyone.

That’s not how children see the world.

Your oldest sees her sibling get away with atrocious behavior all the time—with no consequences. In her head she’s probably thinking if I screamed my head off like that mom would ground me for a month. Little brother gets a hug and a story.

The examples you gave of taking your teen shopping and giving rides to sports are irrelevant. Your teen also sees you spend money on her brother and take him places. I doubt she views you taking her shopping as a huge privilege she gets that her brother doesn’t.

It sounds like you tiptoe around your youngest all the time and you’re annoyed that your older child doesn’t do that. A kid sticking out their tongue at their brother is a trivial offense. It’s childish behavior which is expected from children. Screaming and throwing a tantrum in response is not normal childish behavior. Does your son face any consequences for this behavior? Does he get to explode and then just go along with his day? Your oldest probably remembers some punishment she received when she was 7 for doing less than your son does on a random Tuesday. Of course she’s resentful.

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