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Reply to "Is there a "good way" to be a vessel for your family members' anxieties?"
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[quote=Anonymous]This book might help. "Fjelstad then explains the Caretaker term, or [b]someone who gives up their identity to meet the emotional needs of a borderline or narcissistic loved one,[/b] and points out some typical feelings of a Caretaker and the different types of Caretakers. Fjelstad then helps the reader understand how well-meaning [b]individuals can become Caretakers and continue to stay in this role out of fear, obligation, and guilt. [/b] By focusing on the emotional, cognitive, behavioral, and relationship distortions of Caretakers within their relationship to the BP/NP,[b] she shows readers how caretaking inevitably leads to an endless cycle of relationship chaos, self-neglect, and despair. She ends with saying that the BP/NP cannot be changed and so any improvement must come from the Caretaker’s side, starting with letting go of the hope that Caretaking will work[/b]." https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5379216/[/quote]
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