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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This misery is self-imposed. If you have a high stats kid who seeks rigor (is not pushed by you) and you’re confident they won’t be stressed by playing the game, throw a hat in the ring. But even these kids should be mentally prepared for the fact admission is unlikely. They need to hear the message loud and clear that they are not defined by the name of the school they attend. Send the message early and often that your kids are loved not just for their achievements but because they are unique individuals who are kind, creative, hardworking, etc. Let them know you love them whether they end up at Harvard or community college. I have seen so many kids who struggle with the rejection. It feels like they’ve been set up for failure by parents and a community with unrealistic expectations, that sends the toxic message that the college they attend equates to their worth. [/quote]
The main value of the Selingo book is in amplifying this message, and making it easier for parents to accept it and to convey it to their kids. Because it’s hard not to get seduced by all the marketing pressures.

I have a high stats kid who wants a big school with a big-time football or basketball culture. But now in senior year, every couple of days they start to wonder if they have some kind of moral obligation to apply to HYPSM, just because their SAT is 1550+ and their GPA is top 5% of their high school. The Selingo book has been a really helpful touchstone helping us stay focused on what DC actually wants out of their college experience (which is not the intensity of a hyper-selective school).[/quote]

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